Rugby League Joke

Man, a long time’s passed since my last sports joke, which happens to be the New Golf Shoes joke. I’ve posted a few sports jokes, but I reckon this is the first ever rugby league joke. I’m pretty wrapped with this rugby league joke too because it’s so damn funny.

Funniest Rugby League Joke

Noel Cleal flies to Kabul to watch a young Afghani star play with an inflated goat’s bladder in a local game of rugby league. He is suitably impressed, gets on the phone to Des Hasler, signs the boy on the spot and arranges for him to come over to Sydney.

Two weeks later The Doggies are 12 – 0 down to The Sea Eagles at home with only 20 minutes left – it’s been a hard day at the office. Hasler gives the young Afghani winger the nod, and on he goes. The lad is a sensation, playing an absolute blinder. He scores three tries in 20 minutes, converting all of them himself, from out wide and wins the game for Canterbury.

The Belmore Oval fans are delighted, the players and the coach are delighted, and the media love the new Rugby League star.

When the player comes off the ground, he phones his mum to tell her about his first day in the NRL. “Hello mum, guess what?” he says “I played for 20 minutes today, we were 12 – 0 down, but I scored three tries – they call it a hat-trick -, and we won. Everybody loves me, the fans, the press, they all love me! I’m so bloody happy mum.”

“Wonderful,” says his mum, “Let me tell you about my day … Your father got shot in the street, your sister and I were ambushed and assaulted – she would have been raped but for a passing police vehicle. Your brother has joined a local gang of looters and set fire to some buildings and all while you tell me that you were having a great time!!”

The young lad is very upset. “What can I say mum, but I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?!!! You’re sorry?!!!” says his mum, “It’s your bloody fault we came to Bankstown in the first place!”

Luckily for us, Victoria has another cool rugby league joke for us.

Victoria’s Rugby League Joke

rugby league joke

If you’re looking for more laughs, you should check out my Laughahlics videos. Better still, check out my latest funniest Adults Only jokes.

New Golf Shoes

Man, I’m missing my footy. I think it’s time for another sports joke. Today’s sports joke is about some new golf shows. I’ve written a few sports jokes, like the Golf Hand Job Sports joke and one about general golf humour. As you’ll see, this new golf shoes joke is a little different and one that I’m sure you will like.

Bert’s New Golf Shoes

Bert, at 60 years of age, always wanted a pair of soft spike golf shoes like Fred Couples, so, seeing some on sale after his round, he bought them. He was so delighted with his purchase, he decided to wear them home to show the misses.

Walking proudly into the house, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife, “Notice anything different about me?”

Jennifer who’s 50, looked him over and replied, “Nope.”

Frustrated as hell, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the new golf shoes. Again he asked Jennifer, a little louder this time, “Notice anything different NOW?”

Jennifer looked up and said in her best deadpan response, “Bert, what’s different? It’s hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, and it’ll be hanging down again tomorrow.”

Furious, Bert yells out, “AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT’S HANGING DOWN, JENIFER?”

“Nope. Not a clue”, she replied.

“IT’S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT’S LOOKING AT MY NEW GOLF SHOES!

“Without missing a beat Jennifer replies, “You should have bought a new hat!”

How cool was that. To continue with the golf humour Victoria’s put something together to add to her Victoria’s Jokes collection.

new golf shoes
Knowing how much you guys love a great joke I’m going to include a link to my very popular Friday Funnies. If you missed some of my sports jokes just click here. Or, perhaps you’re more interested in some Hot Sports Babes.

Swimming Jokes

Today’s sports jokes are all about swimming jokes. I’ve decided on a sports joke today because it’s been so long since my last sports joke post. It was the Farts Football post way back on the 10th. March. That being the case I thought it was high time I posted another sports orientated joke. This following joke involves both diving and swimming sports.

Swimming Jokes To Make You Laugh

swimming jokesA man met a beautiful blonde lady and after a short courtship asked her to marry him.

She said, ‘But we don’t know anything about each other.’

He said, ‘That’s all right, we’ll learn about each other as we go along.’

So she consented, they were married, and off they went on a honeymoon at a resort. One morning, they were lying by the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10-metre board and did a two and a half tuck, followed by three rotations in the pike position, at which point he straightened out and cut the water like a knife.

After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on the towel.

She said, ‘That was incredible!’

He said, ‘I  used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we’d learn more about each other as we went along.’

So she got up, jumped in the pool and started doing laps. After seventy-five laps she climbed out of the pool, lay down on her
towel and was hardly out of breath.

He said, ‘That was incredible!  Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?’

‘No,’ she said, ‘I was a prostitute in Mildura, but I worked both sides of the Murray !!!

Finally, let’s have a look at Victoria’s swimming joke.

Victoria's swimming joke

I sure hope you like today’s sports/swimming jokes. If you did why not share it with your friends?

If you’d love some more jokes, why not check out As always, you can get more laughs by checking out my Friday Funnies posts or the rest of my hilarious sports jokes?