New Golf Shoes

Man, I’m missing my footy. I think it’s time for another sports joke. Today’s sports joke is about some new golf shows. I’ve written a few sports jokes, like the Golf Hand Job Sports joke and one about general golf humour. As you’ll see, this new golf shoes joke is a little different and one that I’m sure you will like.

Bert’s New Golf Shoes

Bert, at 60 years of age, always wanted a pair of soft spike golf shoes like Fred Couples, so, seeing some on sale after his round, he bought them. He was so delighted with his purchase, he decided to wear them home to show the misses.

Walking proudly into the house, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife, “Notice anything different about me?”

Jennifer who’s 50, looked him over and replied, “Nope.”

Frustrated as hell, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the new golf shoes. Again he asked Jennifer, a little louder this time, “Notice anything different NOW?”

Jennifer looked up and said in her best deadpan response, “Bert, what’s different? It’s hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, and it’ll be hanging down again tomorrow.”

Furious, Bert yells out, “AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT’S HANGING DOWN, JENIFER?”

“Nope. Not a clue”, she replied.

“IT’S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT’S LOOKING AT MY NEW GOLF SHOES!

“Without missing a beat Jennifer replies, “You should have bought a new hat!”

How cool was that. To continue with the golf humour Victoria’s put something together to add to her Victoria’s Jokes collection.

new golf shoes
Knowing how much you guys love a great joke I’m going to include a link to my very popular Friday Funnies. If you missed some of my sports jokes just click here. Or, perhaps you’re more interested in some Hot Sports Babes.

Golf Sports Joke

Funny Story Of A Woman Golfer

Golf Sports

It’s been a while since I posted a joke and so I though it was about time I gave you guys a real treat.

A group of guys lived and died for their Saturday morning round of golf. One got transferred to another city. It wasn’t the same without him.

A new woman joined their Club. She overheard the guys talking about their  golf round. She said, “You know, I used to play on my golf team in  college and I was pretty good. Would you mind if I joined you next week?”

The three guys looked at each other. Not one of them wanted to say ‘yes’,  but she had them on the spot. Finally, one man said it would be okay, but they would be starting early — at 6:30 a.m.

He figured the early tee-time would discourage her. The woman said this may be a problem and asked if she could be up to 15 minutes late. They  rolled their eyes, but said okay. She smiled and said “Good I’ll be  there at 6:30 or 6:45.”

She showed up at 6:30 sharp and beat all three of them with an  eye-opening 2-under par round. She was fun and a pleasant person and the  guys were impressed. Back at the clubhouse, they congratulated her and  invited her back the next week. She smiled and said “I’ll be there at  6:30 or 6:45.”

The next week she again showed up at 6:30 sharp. Only this time she played left-handed. The three guys were incredulous as she still beat them with an even par round despite playing with her off-hand. They were  totally amazed.

They couldn’t figure her out. She was again very pleasant and didn’t seem to be purposely showing them up. They invited her back again but each man harbored a burning desire to beat her.

The third week the guys had their game faces on. But this time she was 15 minutes late which made the guys irritable. This week the lady played  right-handed and narrowly beat all three of them.

The men mused that her late arrival was due to petty gamesmanship on her part. However she was so gracious and so complimentary of their strong play, they couldn’t hold a grudge.

Back in the clubhouse all three guys were shaking their heads. This woman was a riddle no one could figure out. They had a couple of beers and finally one of the men asked her point blank “How do you decide if  you’re going to golf right-handed or left-handed?”

The lady blushed and grinned. “That’s easy” she said. “When my Dad taught me to play golf I learned I was ambidextrous. I like to switch back and forth. When I got married after college I discovered my husband always sleeps in the nude. From then on I developed a silly habit. Right before I left in the morning for golf practice, I would pull the covers off him.  If his you-know-what was pointing to the right, I golfed right-handed; if it was pointed to the left I golfed left-handed.”

The guys thought this was hysterical. Astonished at this bizarre information, one of the guys shot back, “But what if it’s pointing straight up?”

She said, “Then, I’m fifteen minutes late”

 I don’t know about you but I sure as hell was not expecting that!

And now, a little something from our very own comedian, the sultry Victoria.

Victorias Golf Sports Joke

If you liked those jokes please share it with your friends. You can do so by clicking on your favourite social media icon below.  :thumb_up:

Love golf jokes? Great, here’s some great golf jokes!

Golf Joke Of The Week

Well, I think enough time has gone by since the last Sports Joke to allow me to post another one. Strangely enough, like the last joke this one is all about the sport of golf. What is more interesting is it’s about women who play golf who decide not to wear panties. ;)

Golf Joke About Female Golfers Who Don’t Wear Panties

No PantiesThe Swede’s wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear.

‘Good God, woman! Why aren’t you wearing any skivvies?’, her husband demanded.

‘Well’ she said, ‘you don’t give me enough housekeeping money to afford any.’

The Swede immediately reaches into his pocket and says, ‘For the sake of decency, here’s a 50. Go and buy yourself some underwear..’

Next, the Irishman’s wife bends over to set her ball on the tee..Her skirt also blows up to show that she, too, is wearing no undies. ‘Blessed Virgin Mary, woman! You’ve no knickers. Why not?’

She replies, ‘I can’t afford any on the money you give me.’

Patrick reaches into his pocket and says, ‘For the sake of decency, here’s a 20. Go and buy yourself some underwear”!

Lastly, the Scotsman’s wife bends over. The wind also takes her skirt over her head to reveal that she, too, is naked under it.

‘Sweet mudder of Jaysus, Aggie! Where ta friggin hell are yer drawers?’

She too explains, ‘You dinna give me enough money ta be able ta affarrd any.’

The Scotsman reaches into his pocket and says, ‘Well, fer the love ‘o decency woman, here’s a comb…. Tidy yerself up a bit.

Sexy Golf Video Of Women Learning To Play Golf

Keeping with the golf joke them I found a video that I’m sure you’ll enjoy.

Finally, a not so well known fact about golfers and their sexual exploits with women ;)

golf joke sports joke
If you would like to have some fun with your golfing buddies you’ll probably be interested in these Trick Golf Balls Exploding, Mist, Wobble, Streamer.
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