Golf Sports Joke

Funny Story Of A Woman Golfer

Golf Sports

It’s been a while since I posted a joke and so I though it was about time I gave you guys a real treat.

A group of guys lived and died for their Saturday morning round of golf. One got transferred to another city. It wasn’t the same without him.

A new woman joined their Club. She overheard the guys talking about their  golf round. She said, “You know, I used to play on my golf team in  college and I was pretty good. Would you mind if I joined you next week?”

The three guys looked at each other. Not one of them wanted to say ‘yes’,  but she had them on the spot. Finally, one man said it would be okay, but they would be starting early — at 6:30 a.m.

He figured the early tee-time would discourage her. The woman said this may be a problem and asked if she could be up to 15 minutes late. They  rolled their eyes, but said okay. She smiled and said “Good I’ll be  there at 6:30 or 6:45.”

She showed up at 6:30 sharp and beat all three of them with an  eye-opening 2-under par round. She was fun and a pleasant person and the  guys were impressed. Back at the clubhouse, they congratulated her and  invited her back the next week. She smiled and said “I’ll be there at  6:30 or 6:45.”

The next week she again showed up at 6:30 sharp. Only this time she played left-handed. The three guys were incredulous as she still beat them with an even par round despite playing with her off-hand. They were  totally amazed.

They couldn’t figure her out. She was again very pleasant and didn’t seem to be purposely showing them up. They invited her back again but each man harbored a burning desire to beat her.

The third week the guys had their game faces on. But this time she was 15 minutes late which made the guys irritable. This week the lady played  right-handed and narrowly beat all three of them.

The men mused that her late arrival was due to petty gamesmanship on her part. However she was so gracious and so complimentary of their strong play, they couldn’t hold a grudge.

Back in the clubhouse all three guys were shaking their heads. This woman was a riddle no one could figure out. They had a couple of beers and finally one of the men asked her point blank “How do you decide if  you’re going to golf right-handed or left-handed?”

The lady blushed and grinned. “That’s easy” she said. “When my Dad taught me to play golf I learned I was ambidextrous. I like to switch back and forth. When I got married after college I discovered my husband always sleeps in the nude. From then on I developed a silly habit. Right before I left in the morning for golf practice, I would pull the covers off him.  If his you-know-what was pointing to the right, I golfed right-handed; if it was pointed to the left I golfed left-handed.”

The guys thought this was hysterical. Astonished at this bizarre information, one of the guys shot back, “But what if it’s pointing straight up?”

She said, “Then, I’m fifteen minutes late”

 I don’t know about you but I sure as hell was not expecting that!

And now, a little something from our very own comedian, the sultry Victoria.

Victorias Golf Sports Joke

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Love golf jokes? Great, here’s some great golf jokes!

Blonde Sports Joke

It’s been awhile since my last sports joke so I figured it was about time for another one. Knowing how popular blonde jokes are I thought I’d make this one a blonde sports joke orientated post.

Blonde Sports Joke The Blonde Counsellor

A blonde began a job as an elementary school counsellor and she was eager to help. One day during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself on one side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other.

The blonde approached and asked if she was all right.

The girl said she was.

A little while later, however, Sandy noticed the girl was in the same spot, still by herself. Approaching again, Sandy offered, “Would you like me to be your friend?”

The girl hesitated, then said, “Okay,” looking at the woman suspiciously.

Feeling she was making progress, the blonde then asked, “Why are you standing here all alone?”

“Because,” the little girl said with great exasperation, “I’m the goalie!”  :soccer:

Victoria’s Blonde Sports Joke

In one of my previous sports jokes posts I introduced you to one of Sexy Sal’s blonde jokes. I love Sexy Sal’s blonde jokes but Sexy Sal belongs to WassupBlog. I think it’s only appropriate that EZ eSports Betting deserves it’s very own Sexy Sports Comedian. I looked high and low for a sexy sports mascot that would fit the bill and I finally found her.

She’s Victoria and she was named after the Roman Goddess of the same name. Even though the Goddess Victoria was more a symbol of victory over death determining who would be successful during a war I have named her the Goddess Of Sports

Our Victoria also has a love for sports and loves it when her teams are victorious. She also has a great sense of humour and loves to tell a good joke. Today is Victoria’s debut on ezesportsbetting.com, and keeping with the theme of this post it just happens to be a blonde sports joke.

blonde sports jokes Victoria's blonde joke

 

I couldn’t find any blonde sports jokes on YouTube but I did manage to find a sports related video that I know you will enjoy. Heck, you may even see a blonde or two in there  :tongue_out: It’s called…

Funniest Sports Moments Of 2013

That’s all folks. Don’t forget to vote for The Hottest Sports Babe.

Oh, if you enjoyed this weeks post leave a comment saying what you liked about it. Heck, you might even want to give it a Tweet or share it on FaceBook or something.  😀

Sports Betting Jokes

What’s that I hear? You want some more sports betting jokes? What a coincidence I was planning on writing a sports betting jokes post anyway. 😀

I reckon we all know that sports have probably been a popular pass time for centuries. That being the case we can probably also say that punters have been betting on sports for centuries. Well I’ve come across a joke that is so old it’s positively Biblical. I give to you the…….

Oldest Sports Betting Joke

Oldest Sports betting joke sports betting

 

This next joke may not technically be a sport betting joke but it’s definitely a betting joke and it takes place in the most popular place ever for placing bets. The local pub.

The Travelling Salesman Pub Bet

A travelling salesman wanders into a country pub and  notices that there is a fishbowl full of $10 notes sitting on the bar. After ordering a pint of Fosters the salesman ask the barman what the deal with the fishbowl full of cash was.

“Well,” says the barman, “we have this donkey out the back who hasn’t uttered a peep in all the years that we’ve had him. If you can make that dumb ass donkey make some sort of noise you win all that money in the fishbowl. All it will cost you is to put ten bucks in the kitty.

“No bloody worries mate,” says the salesman. “I’ll take that bet!” The salesman proceeds to place ten dollars into the fishbowl and then wanders out the back. Not two minutes later the donkey stars to Hee Hawing. The salesman wanders back into the bar and without a word pockets all the money and leaves the pub.

A couple of weeks later he visits the pub again and notices the fishbowl full of $20 notes. He orders another pint of Fosters and points to the fishbowl. “Whats with all the money this time” he asks the barman.

“Mate, ever since the last time you were in we haven’t been able to shut that damn donkey up. Anyone who can shut him up will win everything in that fishbowl. This time though it will cost twenty bucks to give it a try.”

“Shit mate. That sounds like a really sweet deal. I reckon I’ll take some of that action!” The salesman pulls out his wallet and places twenty bucks into the fishbowl, shoving the wallet back into his pocket as he saunters out to the back of the pub. A few minutes later the donkey stops braying. There is absolute quiet! The salesman walks back into the bar and again pockets all the cash. He was just about to leave when the barman stops him. “Hang on a sec matey. Before you go running off again you have to tell us exactly what you did to make him bray and then what you did to make shut him up.”

Easy says the salesman. The first time I whispered in his ear and told him my cock was bigger than his. The second time I showed him.”

I’m not sure if you’ve ever heard that one before because I heard that one way back when I was in high school!

You know, I didn’t think I’d be able to find a Sports betting Joke video, but I looked around YouTube and came up with a really good one. The guy telling the joke is Hannibal Buress. He’s telling the joke live from Chicago and it’s a joke about betting on basketball.

That’s it folks. I sure hope you liked this weeks sports betting jokes. If you really liked it perhaps you wouldn’t mind sharing the post with your mates. Just use the social media icons you find below. 😉